Play Ball!

This weekend marks the opening of the 2010 College World Series. I am not a baseball fan but Himself loves the CWS and I've gotten sucked in. At first, I thought I would just pay enough attention to know what he was talking about but, two years ago when we were getting to know each other, I found myself actually watching the games and picking favorites. Same thing last year and again this year. There's something about college sports that is so much more interesting to me than professional - college sports have heart and pageantry and a desire to win for winning's sake. When I visited Omaha in April, I made sure that Himself drove me to Rosenblatt Stadium so I could see it for myself.

This is the last year the CWS will be held at Rosenblatt. Omaha is building a fabulous new stadium and I plan to attend CWS games as a Nebraskan in years to come, but I am sad that I missed the chance to take in a game at Rosenblatt.

Coincidentally, life threw me another curve ball last week. It has to do with Himself and it has changed the landscape of our relationship forever. It's so big that I haven't wrapped my head around it and I can't bring myself to tell you about it yet.

I am still moving to Lincoln and I am still talking to Himself but a dream has been destroyed and things will never be the same.

In other news:

I gave my notice at the grocery store. My last day will be next Friday. I have to work at my full-time job on Saturday, so let this be notice to the world that on Sunday, June 28, I plan to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. If I hadn't stayed home sick ** on Tuesday and Wednesday, I would have worked 34 days in a row at one or both jobs, including the 90-hour week in Chicago. Oy. It's official - I am not a workaholic.

On Friday, my boss practically begged me to stay. He offered several things but no guarantee of money ("we'll try..."). It was great to hear the complimentary things he said about me and my work but it really only reaffirmed my conviction to move to Lincoln. Even the new state of affairs with Himself has not lessened Nebraska's pull.

** I called in "sick" on Tuesday, planning to take an unscheduled mental health day. By the end of the day, my throat was scratchy and I felt lousy. I called in on Wednesday, feeling genuinely puny. When Himself called that afternoon, he teased that that's what I get for playing hooky. I guess that'll teach me! (Or not...)

Walking on Air, Sorta

Hi, honey, I'm home!

I managed a week-long event in Chicago last week. The participants were 20 college junior and senior young women. I can now add "cowboy" to my resume because last week I learned to herd.

While in Chicago, we visited the Sears Willis Tower Skydeck. I stepped out onto The Ledge, which was SO COOL!

That's the side of Sears Willis Tower under my left foot, Wacker Drive under my right foot, and the Chicago River to the right of that.

After working about 140 hours in the last two weeks, I took a mental health day today. I'm telling you, it really is good for the soul to check out every now and then. But, um, I'm not so sure one day was enough!

I've been up to 1,353 feet - what have you been up to?

Lemme see you just bounce it with me

Because I channel-surfed onto Men in Black while folding towels and it made me smile...

One of those days

Things here are fine.
Things are good.
There is nothing wrong today.

And yet, it's one of those days when I am blue. I am chalking it up to the confluence of two situations:

1 - I am tired and overwhelmed. Working 60-70 hours a week between the two jobs these days, waiting to hear if my apartment rental application has been approved, preparing for the biggest event of my work year, worrying about money for and after the big move, starting to think about packing, considering a garage sale (yuck), and wondering how I will get everything done in the next 4 days that needs to be done before I can leave town for 9 days to manage the big event.

2 - This weekend marks the second anniversary of my first face-to-face meeting with Himself. I know life never turns out quite the way we want or expect, and I accept where we are now. Even more importantly, I have let go of any expectations for our future - I put on my water wings and now I am simply floating and waiting to see where the tide takes us. But still, I can't help but think about where we were two years ago and how I felt. That weekend was one of the happiest moments of my life.

I am trying to shake off the blues, to see the silver lining. Two years ago I hoped that I would be moving to Nebraska to pursue a relationship with Himself. Well, I am - it's just happening a year later than I hoped. Our relationship isn't as committed as I hoped it would be but I think it's unrealistic to think it could be anything more than it is after two years of being so far apart. I am optimistically curious to see how it changes when we are much closer geographically.

Sure, the work hours are exhausting and the second job takes a huge bite out of my free time, but there are a lot of people who don't even have one job...and I wouldn't be able to make the move to Lincoln without both jobs.

Why can't I just be happy with today? It's a gorgeous, warm/hot, sunny day - my favorite kind...but all I want to do is curl up in a dark spot and cry.

Friday Fill-in #178

1. Potato chip chicken -- the best food to take on a picnic.
2. Summer ROCKS!!!
3. My toes are too delicate to wear flip flops.
4. To love someone is the best thing ever.
5. I would love to get to the point where I am fit enough to enjoy a long hike.
6. When I crave food, it's usually high calorie and high carb.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to buying a new pair of shoes - whee!, tomorrow my plans include cleaning and working - not so much whee, and Sunday, I want to nap between church and my shift at the grocery store.

Grace in Small Things #20 - The Food Photo Edition

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6. (hold the strawberries, thankyouverymuch)

Friday Fill-In #176

1. I just had a dream that I was kissing Mozart.

2. God is.

3. The third sentence on the 7th page of the book I'm reading: "There is not a foot of space between the chairs of the guests, and Tamoszius is so short that he pokes them with his bow whenever he reaches over for the low notes; but still he presses in, and insists relentlessly that his companions must follow." (The Jungle by Upton Sinclair - I would have hated this book 20 years ago but I am completely enthralled now.)

4. As the World Turns tickles my fancy.

5. I was walking 30 minutes a day, 3-4 days a week...until I started the part-time job that leaves me with no time or energy for exercise.

6. Eddie Izzard makes me laugh!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to working at the grocery store (although 'looking forward to' doesn't really describe my feelings), tomorrow my plans include coloring my hair (a new color - pray for me!) and working at the store, and Sunday, I want to skip church and sleep in because I am scheduled to work 7 hours in hell at the grocery store!